Wednesday, August 19, 2009

A big day: Someone reads my blog

After having written this blog with a kind of self imposed regularity and reluctance, the months of thought diarrhea and posting about silly irrelevant things have been finally rewarded, and by rewarded, I mean glanced over by some guy in America.

Yes, the infamous Sergent D of Metal Inquisition fame and more recently the controversial "Stuff You Will Hate" (with its abysmal color scheme, although is this ironic?), has left no fewer than three comments, all, unless my online sarcasm detector is on the fritz, positive in nature. This means one thing....someone has read my blog. I haven't told anyone about it, just kind of done it cos that's what the kids do nowadays, It was originally a displacement activity from studying for my first year finals conceived at about 5 or 6 in the morning, and since then it just kind of stuck like a bout of athletes foot that though you are kind of embarrassed about and don't show the world, you still like to get it out and have a good old self indulgent scratch once in a while. Therefore, that someone has found it and actually read what is pretty much a 21st century diary, makes me feel both overwhelmed and exposed. Like having a chick over who discovers your athletes foot and instead of being revolted, unexpectedly scratches it gently, while purring in your ear.

Maybe this is the beginning of me becoming a famous web scene kid, such as the notorious KikiKannibal, Zui Suicide, Dani Gore or whatnot....for a full list consult this yahoo answers page. I would probably need a new name, as my current name dosn't really rhyme with anything, much less any choice scene buzzwords like Br00tality, Gore, Suicide or any other words that are essentially a bad thing happening. I wonder if there is a limit to how far that can go. For example, I would kind of like something sort of medical and Carcass-esque...maybe a rare disease. Mikey Maleria, or Ethan Ebola would be cool....if I was called Mike or Ethan. Or maybe just an obscure organ....DannyDuodenum (thats part of your large intestine). These strike me as much more interesting than vague words like Gore and Suicide. Give them a little TM on the myspace and heyyyy...new scene hero.

So anyway, the fact that the first person to read my blog (that I know of) is Sergent D is an exiting development because Metal Inquisition was the first blog I really started following, and taught me such important life lessons like it's ok to like brokeNCYDE and Slam Metal simultaniously, if your friends make fun of you for wearing something, chicks will most likely dig it (within reason, I once wore a pair of swimming trunks in my school days so small i didn't notice I had a bollock hanging out, that took about 2 years to live down), how to tastefully appropriate Wigger culture into metal, not to ever go to New Jersey, and that pretty much all careers in metal end in depressing living conditions and a meaningless middle age existance. If you are the second person to read my blog and haven't already, check his blogs, read them, and learn.

The fact that a glance over by some 30 odd year old American recovering metalhead in the midst of a early-onset midlife crisis (although unlike in American Beauty, where Kevin Spacey buys a sweet car, instead he opts for the more financially viable option of liking brokeNCYDE), much like I cling to my fleeing teenage years by dressing like a 17 year old instead of a 20 year old, and hang around with 18 year olds, has inspired me to waste time writing this post when I could have been learning German, practicing guitar, or at the very worst playing GTA4, shows just how hopeless the internet is turning our generation, and sending our prioritys to shit. Horray for a passive aggressive future where irony is slopped on so thick that saying anything means the opposite as well, depending on which is more hip at the time. I knew starting a blog was a bad idea.

Tomorrow I go to Manchester to record some guitar for sick new songs in a friends sick home studio. They are largely about rape and dismemberment. I also need to get the other guitarist down before he fucks off to Greece and becomes the Karate Kid.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Horray for a passive aggressive future where irony is slopped on so thick that saying anything means the opposite as well, depending on which is more hip at the time

I am excited for this future! Now where is that 40 and my neon pink Nikes?

Anonymous said...

I too read your blog, but I'm gay and looking to fuck you!

<3
an anonymous faggit

SkullKrusher said...

"if your friends make fun of you for wearing something, chicks will most likely dig it "

truer words have never been spoken, and that's why i love the sarg!

thx for reading MI, btw!

Vincent said...

I'm now following your blog. D is good company.

Also, having been a developer on GTA4 (totally true, i'm one of the few names in the credits twice) I can tell you that reading MI and picking up girls is a much better use of your time.

Eyelicker said...

Sick, i'll look out for a twice appearing "Vincent" if I ever get round to finishing it

SkullKrusher: Sarge's post on that inspired me to get my current scene haircut complete with blonde streak, that got me both scorn and female attention aplenty

Anonymous said...

That combination is when you know you're on the right track!

Many, many people think Krusher and I are annoying assholes. Both of us also have wizard-level game and have hooked up with tons of hotties. Do you think those two things have anything to do with each other? I am thinking they do!

grobi wunder said...

Thought I'd use this as an excuse to drop a comment, too... Got here today 'cause of the name-dropping (is it still called that or is there some new blog-inspired word for it nowadays?) the Sarge did. If he likes it, it's "well good" enough for me, I thought. And was right!
Keep up the good work and maybe see you in Wacken next year!

Eyelicker said...

hahaha

"well good"

rock on man!

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Picking up Women said...

Therefore, that someone has found it and actually read what is pretty much a 21st century diary, makes me feel both overwhelmed and exposed.